Hitting Refresh
The past couple of months has been a massive eye opener for me as to how toxic my relationship with social media is. I spent the whole of last weekend trying to turn myself into something I'm not and when it didn't work out I felt like a failure. I felt so far from me it pushed me into a headspace where no-one wants to be and all because I couldn't stop comparing myself to the girls I saw as flawless.
So, after the longgg couple of months of feeling like I'm losing myself, I've decided it's time to hit the 'refresh' button on my life and take those necessary steps towards feeling more myself again.
I've made a few changes in my life and though they've been very recent I've noticed a massive impact. The change that has the most impact on my life currently is using social media a lot less. I spent most of my days scrolling through Instagram feeling worthless because I wasn't like the girls I was looking at so I've made the decision to switch my hours of 'social media time' for hours of 'social time'.
Being physically social is incredibly important to me, small things like walking the dog or going to the shop I would often put off in fear of having a panic attack. In reality, I have been in control of my anxiety for the past 2 years and the more often I do those tasks the more control I have over it.
Another small thing I've done to feel more confident with-in myself is re-developing my own personal style. My wardrobe is not even close to how I would like it to be but experimenting with the pieces I own, wearing my hair the way I want and trying out new makeup looks is helping me feel so much more confident and happy with my appearance.
I've always been an incredibly spiritual person, however, over the past couple of months, I haven't really indulged in that area of my life. Although my spirituality isn't something I'm going to go into great detail about in this post it is something I have been putting that little extra time into and by doing that I feel so much more complete. I see myself as a very independent person but having something to rely on when I need guidance really helps me stay positive and feel less 'lost'.
Additionally, I find a lot of guidance from my friends. The people I surround myself with are incredibly honest and caring people and I really wouldn't be where I am now without them. They have offered me so much support and love whenever it's been needed. By surrounding myself with people that truly care about me I've been able to adopt a much more positive mindset and gives me someone to talk to on the days things aren't so great.
I have a long way to go but I'm truly so much happier now I've hit the 'refresh' button. These are obviously only a small handful of the things I've done to feel better about myself and a lot of my insecurities have been caused by a lack of self-acceptance and too much comparison.
It was hard for me to accept that the girls I saw online weren't my competition and that maybe the truest version of me is the best me.
It was hard for me to accept that the girls I saw online weren't my competition and that maybe the truest version of me is the best me.
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